Monday, August 24, 2009
Saturday, August 22, 2009
what is love.
No. this is not a new jeopardy edition...
But seriously, WHAT IS love?
Everything in this world comes back by the desire to be LOVED.
money, power, you name it.
The underlying drive between every motive is to be loved or to take care of those that we love
Try it.
If only I was _richer_ I would be happy.
The purpose of money is to accumulate.
To further your position.
To be able to have people look up to you.
When people look up to you, they respect you.
Those whom which you respect you learn to love.
HOWEVER I AM NOT AT ALL IMPLYING THAT MONEY EQUATES TO HAPPINESS OR LOVE.
I think that we our own selves are our harshest critics. It is SO much easier to rattle off faults and weaknesses than it is for strengths, at least for me. It often takes another to see you for the good that you currently possess and for the possibilities of who you will become. This is not to say that another person will make you WHOLE.
FALSE.
I believe that any relationship built upon the notion of "completing each other" is destined for failure. Obviously, everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses and two people can fit together really well and accomplish tremendous feats. However, if one is not WHOLE and HAPPY with their self before getting involved with someone, it will result in heartbreak and compromised self esteem. Also, insecurity will manifest itself while dating and JEALOUSY the thing that taints trust and causes relationships to crumble will arise... not good news.
a) I believe that LOVE IS A DRUG to those that have never felt whole before, that have never loved themselves. I've been in this position before. It is literally an addictive feeling to have someone care SO much about you that they would be willing to do anything so you could avoid hurt. Sounds pretty good.. right? However, like with any addition... too much is a problem. This kind of love you start to lose your own identity... since you never really loved yourself before, the argument can be posed that you didn't really have an establish sense of sense. When love is addictive, one often feels trapped. Terrified at the possibility of losing this established sense of SECURITY that the other person provides. Security and safety that YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH. However, this reassurance needs to come from within.
b) You choose who you love... Fear often prevents yourself from loving completely or also letting go. Being in love and giving of your entirety of soul is a daunting situation... what if someone sees all of your flaws? heaven forbid. Those are supposed to stay hidden, only WE can know what those are ... right? When you CHOOSE to let go and make yourself emotionally vulnerable is when you can freely love. This vulnerablitity is one of the most beautiful experiences. To be transparent is a liberating experience. To have someone KNOW all of you flaws and to still love you is sort of a surreal experience. How can somebody love someone that is so imperfect? However, love allows you to see the good. However, love can also be blind if one is too afraid to see flaws in the other person. This exchange and consideration of faults I believe is essential to being in love.
d) Love is WORK. period. It is beautiful, but it requires selflessness. It's an exchange. One person lifts the other constantly. When neglected, love diminishes. The constant concern for the other person's happiness needs to be considered. If you realize that a relationship is not right you can "fall out of love" with that person... but it is a choice, a difficult one at that.
Something that I've thought ALOT about recently due to the possessiveness in fresno. I'm not pointing fingers, but really... some people need to grow up.
When a relationship or a perceived relationship isn't right, THAT'S WHEN IT NEEDS TO END.
There is no point in convincing someone to be with you, when they don't want to be with YOU.
Possessiveness is synonymous with psychotic.
You do not own anyone unless there are rings involved. period.
Let it go when things don't work out.
Who wants to love someone that doesn't love them back?
Eventually you will feel negleted and will become bitter and you will "fall out of love" by choice because it hurts so much to care so much about someone that doesn't care about you back.
Relationships go in ebbs and flow, let it go! What is meant to be will be.
All things said, I am a very lucky girl.
To have someone as wonderful as Andy in my life who always finds a way to make me smile and is willing to work things out when things get sticky. I love him sort of alot. [ I don't want to get too sappy, that's what letters are for right] ha.
note: I am not dr. love, this is simply my opinion... what i've learned. the end.
But seriously, WHAT IS love?
Everything in this world comes back by the desire to be LOVED.
money, power, you name it.
The underlying drive between every motive is to be loved or to take care of those that we love
Try it.If only I was _richer_ I would be happy.
The purpose of money is to accumulate.
To further your position.
To be able to have people look up to you.
When people look up to you, they respect you.
Those whom which you respect you learn to love.
HOWEVER I AM NOT AT ALL IMPLYING THAT MONEY EQUATES TO HAPPINESS OR LOVE.
Some say that
a) love is a DRUG
b) love is a choice, it's all in your head
c) someone that you fall for, "girl can't help it"- thanks fergie
d) love is potentially fleeting... once you fall out of love, you can't do anything about it.
b) love is a choice, it's all in your head
c) someone that you fall for, "girl can't help it"- thanks fergie
d) love is potentially fleeting... once you fall out of love, you can't do anything about it.
I think that we our own selves are our harshest critics. It is SO much easier to rattle off faults and weaknesses than it is for strengths, at least for me. It often takes another to see you for the good that you currently possess and for the possibilities of who you will become. This is not to say that another person will make you WHOLE.
FALSE.
I believe that any relationship built upon the notion of "completing each other" is destined for failure. Obviously, everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses and two people can fit together really well and accomplish tremendous feats. However, if one is not WHOLE and HAPPY with their self before getting involved with someone, it will result in heartbreak and compromised self esteem. Also, insecurity will manifest itself while dating and JEALOUSY the thing that taints trust and causes relationships to crumble will arise... not good news.
Now back to our potential answers
a) love is a DRUG
b) love is a choice, it's all in your head
c) someone that you fall for, "girl can't help it"- thanks fergie
d) love is potentially fleeting... once you fall out of love, you can't do anything about it.
a) love is a DRUG
b) love is a choice, it's all in your head
c) someone that you fall for, "girl can't help it"- thanks fergie
d) love is potentially fleeting... once you fall out of love, you can't do anything about it.
a) I believe that LOVE IS A DRUG to those that have never felt whole before, that have never loved themselves. I've been in this position before. It is literally an addictive feeling to have someone care SO much about you that they would be willing to do anything so you could avoid hurt. Sounds pretty good.. right? However, like with any addition... too much is a problem. This kind of love you start to lose your own identity... since you never really loved yourself before, the argument can be posed that you didn't really have an establish sense of sense. When love is addictive, one often feels trapped. Terrified at the possibility of losing this established sense of SECURITY that the other person provides. Security and safety that YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH. However, this reassurance needs to come from within.
b) You choose who you love... Fear often prevents yourself from loving completely or also letting go. Being in love and giving of your entirety of soul is a daunting situation... what if someone sees all of your flaws? heaven forbid. Those are supposed to stay hidden, only WE can know what those are ... right? When you CHOOSE to let go and make yourself emotionally vulnerable is when you can freely love. This vulnerablitity is one of the most beautiful experiences. To be transparent is a liberating experience. To have someone KNOW all of you flaws and to still love you is sort of a surreal experience. How can somebody love someone that is so imperfect? However, love allows you to see the good. However, love can also be blind if one is too afraid to see flaws in the other person. This exchange and consideration of faults I believe is essential to being in love.
c) Chemistry.
Yes, I believe that some people are more compatible than others. However, LOVE IS A CHOICE. It takes courage to invest emotionally in another and to become vulnerable to potential hurt. Falling in love is more a realization that you really are starting to care about this person. You don't just all of the sudden realize in a split second, 'I love you. the end" However, some things I can't explain. Like, love at first sight.... I don't know how it works, but to an extent i'm a believer but in a different sense.d) Love is WORK. period. It is beautiful, but it requires selflessness. It's an exchange. One person lifts the other constantly. When neglected, love diminishes. The constant concern for the other person's happiness needs to be considered. If you realize that a relationship is not right you can "fall out of love" with that person... but it is a choice, a difficult one at that.
Something that I've thought ALOT about recently due to the possessiveness in fresno. I'm not pointing fingers, but really... some people need to grow up.
When a relationship or a perceived relationship isn't right, THAT'S WHEN IT NEEDS TO END.
There is no point in convincing someone to be with you, when they don't want to be with YOU.
Possessiveness is synonymous with psychotic.
You do not own anyone unless there are rings involved. period.
Let it go when things don't work out.
Who wants to love someone that doesn't love them back?
Eventually you will feel negleted and will become bitter and you will "fall out of love" by choice because it hurts so much to care so much about someone that doesn't care about you back.
Relationships go in ebbs and flow, let it go! What is meant to be will be.
All things said, I am a very lucky girl.
To have someone as wonderful as Andy in my life who always finds a way to make me smile and is willing to work things out when things get sticky. I love him sort of alot. [ I don't want to get too sappy, that's what letters are for right] ha.
note: I am not dr. love, this is simply my opinion... what i've learned. the end.
Friday, August 21, 2009
rub my belly
meet:Siddhartha Gautama
ohmygoodness.
I absolutely love reading and learning about philosophy, the development of religion, virtues (A Small Treatise on the Great Virtues is golden), purpose, etc .
Aristotle. Plato (esp. cave allegory). Socrates. Kant. Descartes. Ekhart Toole
One of my recent favorites is Siddhartha Gautama; aka the founder of Buddhism.
I love the simplicity and truth found within his teachings.
I believe that goodness and truth can be found in many sources, not just one.
If you subject yourself to only one way of thinking, you limit the amount of goodness and truth that can enter into your life.
No, i'm not turning "Buddhist", but i'm also not so concerned with titles. I think truth is truth no matter where it is found.
LOOK ELSEWHERE!
Let these marinate:
The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed.
I love this because fear limits our potential, what we are capable of accomplishing. When you rid yourself of fear and just DO, the potential to achieve what you want is actually a possibility. However, if the fear of failure stops you from even trying, the YOU WILL FAIL, because you didn't take any steps towards accomplishment. I think that often times that we are too dependent on others for our own destiny. Rather than waiting for someone else to step in and rescue you, FIGURE IT OUT. Also, I've realized that thinking "I'll be happy______" is poison. I've heard so many times: I'll be happy when i'm:
married.
in a relationship.
making money.
wearing that shirt.
weighing less.
Happiness comes from within. Circumstance is omnipresent. Things happen. But luckily we can choose reactions. Rather than saying, "I'm so broke. I'm hopeless." Be productive and say, "Hey, I have $.20 in my bank account, I should start working more hours and spending less."
BE PROACTIVE AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.
There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.
I love this. No explanation needed other than rid yourself of fear of what you will find and START THINKING.
Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful.
I love the simplicity and truth found within his teachings.
I believe that goodness and truth can be found in many sources, not just one.
If you subject yourself to only one way of thinking, you limit the amount of goodness and truth that can enter into your life.
No, i'm not turning "Buddhist", but i'm also not so concerned with titles. I think truth is truth no matter where it is found.
LOOK ELSEWHERE!
Let these marinate:
The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed.
I love this because fear limits our potential, what we are capable of accomplishing. When you rid yourself of fear and just DO, the potential to achieve what you want is actually a possibility. However, if the fear of failure stops you from even trying, the YOU WILL FAIL, because you didn't take any steps towards accomplishment. I think that often times that we are too dependent on others for our own destiny. Rather than waiting for someone else to step in and rescue you, FIGURE IT OUT. Also, I've realized that thinking "I'll be happy______" is poison. I've heard so many times: I'll be happy when i'm:
married.
in a relationship.
making money.
wearing that shirt.
weighing less.
Happiness comes from within. Circumstance is omnipresent. Things happen. But luckily we can choose reactions. Rather than saying, "I'm so broke. I'm hopeless." Be productive and say, "Hey, I have $.20 in my bank account, I should start working more hours and spending less."
BE PROACTIVE AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.
There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.
I love this. No explanation needed other than rid yourself of fear of what you will find and START THINKING.
Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful.
...Made you think.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
great gift ideas
For the American Idol Fan:
For the friend who is between boyfriends or an aspiring cat lady:
For those family members who are curious as to what a heart attack would be like:
For the spoiled pooch owner:
For the learning impaired (ME) to help study for anatomy :
For the overly competitive guy:
For your friends who live in cold places, or can't afford boob jobs:
For the whacked out child:
For the open minded pet owner:
For _________? haha...
For the hardcore bible lovers who are out to scar their children for life:
For the friend who is between boyfriends or an aspiring cat lady:For those family members who are curious as to what a heart attack would be like:For the spoiled pooch owner:For the learning impaired (ME) to help study for anatomy :
For the overly competitive guy:
For your friends who live in cold places, or can't afford boob jobs:
For the whacked out child:
For the open minded pet owner:For _________? haha...
For the hardcore bible lovers who are out to scar their children for life:
How to become anti-social
It's really quite simple, all you need to do is:
1) try to become a dental hygienist
2) follow this schedule
Monday: work 7-4:30
Tuesday: CHEM 8-9:30,
[drive to madera]
ANATOMY 6-8:50
Wednesday: work 7-4:30
Thursday: CHEM 8-9:30
CHEM lab 9:30 - 12: 30
Work dental office 1-5 [drive to madera]
ANATOMY 6-8:50
Friday: work 7-4:30
Saturday:
Psychology 8:00-10:55
Sociology 11:00-1:55
I'm really "excited" to see how four sciences courses go in one semester. I'm hoping to complete all of my pre-reqs in two semesters so that I can get into a program fall of 10'.
Until then, my social life I feel like is going to be non-existent and consisting of study groups for anatomy, which is going to kill me. ahh..
thank goodness for hunting season. hopefully andy won't feel TOO neglected.
1) try to become a dental hygienist
2) follow this schedule
Monday: work 7-4:30
Tuesday: CHEM 8-9:30,
[drive to madera]
ANATOMY 6-8:50
Wednesday: work 7-4:30
Thursday: CHEM 8-9:30
CHEM lab 9:30 - 12: 30
Work dental office 1-5 [drive to madera]
ANATOMY 6-8:50
Friday: work 7-4:30
Saturday:
Psychology 8:00-10:55
Sociology 11:00-1:55
I'm really "excited" to see how four sciences courses go in one semester. I'm hoping to complete all of my pre-reqs in two semesters so that I can get into a program fall of 10'.
Until then, my social life I feel like is going to be non-existent and consisting of study groups for anatomy, which is going to kill me. ahh..
thank goodness for hunting season. hopefully andy won't feel TOO neglected.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
man's best friend
So yesterday, I went to AVILA beach on a ward beach trip.
SOOO much fun.
the weather was absolutely perfect and the people my favorites.
Dani, Sami and I took a walk along the beach and found this gathering of dogs... the happiest dogs that you have ever seen.
Splashing in the water, chasing seagulls, seriously smiling.
I started thinking about how much I miss this girl.
Cassie was MY dog.
I had to beg my parents a million times over to let us get a dog.
I would wake up at 6 in middle school to take her around laps the backyard and play with her.
My mom would call me out of school if I forgot to clean up her doggy business.
This isn't to say that she was the "perfect" dog, but her quirkiness made her even more loveable.
Like when I took her for a walk and she jumped and took the hat off a little baby walking in the park [she didnt actually touch the baby, just strategically grabbed the hat]
or when she'd smash her face against the sliding glass door and start making the weirdest noises that you've ever heard trying to get your attention.
or when there was a thunderstorm, or fireworks she'd pretty much go into cardiac arrest: barking, scratching, terrified of the loud noises.
She definitely was a little bit marly-esque.
Afterall, we found out after getting her that though she was a purebred, she was inbred. ha.
But more importantly SHE LOVED.
Unfortunately she passed away when she was only 5 and I miss her sooo much.
Dogs are so selfless, when you need them, they are there.
They know how to bring you up when you're feeling down, and to celebrate when things are good..
When I do get another dog, I definitely want it to be another golden retriever.
Riley.
Can't wait to meet her : )
the weather was absolutely perfect and the people my favorites.
Dani, Sami and I took a walk along the beach and found this gathering of dogs... the happiest dogs that you have ever seen.
Splashing in the water, chasing seagulls, seriously smiling.
I started thinking about how much I miss this girl.
Cassie was MY dog. I had to beg my parents a million times over to let us get a dog.
I would wake up at 6 in middle school to take her around laps the backyard and play with her.
My mom would call me out of school if I forgot to clean up her doggy business.
This isn't to say that she was the "perfect" dog, but her quirkiness made her even more loveable.
Like when I took her for a walk and she jumped and took the hat off a little baby walking in the park [she didnt actually touch the baby, just strategically grabbed the hat]
or when she'd smash her face against the sliding glass door and start making the weirdest noises that you've ever heard trying to get your attention.
or when there was a thunderstorm, or fireworks she'd pretty much go into cardiac arrest: barking, scratching, terrified of the loud noises.
She definitely was a little bit marly-esque.
Afterall, we found out after getting her that though she was a purebred, she was inbred. ha.
But more importantly SHE LOVED.
Unfortunately she passed away when she was only 5 and I miss her sooo much.
Dogs are so selfless, when you need them, they are there.
They know how to bring you up when you're feeling down, and to celebrate when things are good..
When I do get another dog, I definitely want it to be another golden retriever.
Riley.
Can't wait to meet her : )
Friday, August 14, 2009
of all the fish in the sea...
Andy, being the mountain man that he is was insistent that I go fishing with him.
His friend Brian lives on a huge piece of property complete with a river behind it, ponds and lakes.
After a little bit of convincing we set out and went to go catch some fish!
Final score:
Andy: 3
Lauren: 0... well i DID hook something... ANDY! ha well, his backpack.
Luckily, Andy was nice enough to share some of his catches with me and let me reel them in...
He even made me hold one!
You have to hold them by their jaws and for some reason i panicked when I thought about how it couldn't breathe and when it started to flop around, I DROPPED IT IN THE DIRT.
Poor Andy had to hike down to where it fell to release it back into the water.
poor fish.
I can't wait to go again and actually catch a fish : )
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